mad heiress tv

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all episodes feature subtitles for the empathy impaired: "he is now showing understanding" "they are now demonstrating patience and acceptance"

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i.

a refuseniky sitcom in the style of friends.  but where every side character and bit part extra is given his or her own backstory, so the show never gets around to telling the story of the main characters. the show's lead characters would all be famous tv actors (nathan fillion, zoey deschanel, julia loius dreyfuss, etc.) and would feature in the show's marketing. each episode would begin with them in their apartment that they share. after a minute or two of quirky dialog, they'd head out for some activity (the name of that episode would reflect the activity, like s1 ep3 would be titled “coffee shop”). 

 

but when the camera follows them outside, it gets distracted by an extra, like the nameless girl at the coffee shop who takes their order. the camera then stays with her for the next 25 minutes and follows her as she clocks out and goes about her day. no attempt is made to entertain. we see her picking up her laundry, taking her dog for a walk, taking a shit, arguing with her mother on the phone, paying her biills, surfing facebook, etc.

 

as she walks past the apartment later that evening where the show's main characters live, the camera pans back up several stories and through the window and into the apartment of the main characters, who are all “ can you believe what he did?” and laughing uproariously.  it's clear that something zany and unexpected happened to them while the show was focused on the nameless barista. but we the audience are denied this information. 

 

part of the fun of the show is never knowing what bit part actor is going to be the focus, or what is going to happen to them. we might spend one episode just following a traffic cop who is ticketing improperly parked cars.. as well as the tension of having missed out on the key information that the main characters are reacting to. 

 

the show becomes a big hit and attracts guest stars like tom cruise and jennifer garner, who are similarly robbed of their expected screen time.

 

fans have to fill in the gaps of what happened to our main characters each episode, so a vibrant fanfiction community springs up. cosplayers start dressing up as their favorite bit-part actor from an episode. 

 

ii

scene in a sci-fi show where a bar fight in a dangerous part of town happens via twitter.  tough looking dudes all perched on bar stools beside one another, tweeting furiously at one another. the bartender cowering in fear behind the bar, gripping his phone in abject terror, watching it unfold on his feed 

 

iii

riff on the comedy central show comedians in cars getting coffee:

• comedians in cars getting fist fucked

• comedians in cars getting rhinoplasty

• comedians in cars getting served restraining orders

• comedians in cars getting tax audits

• comedians in cars getting circumcised 

• comedians in cars writing sonnets

• comedians with sars getting treatment

• white male comedians onstage getting cancelled

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